"There are so many wonderful things happening in your life! Why aren't you happy?"
She wasn't accusing, just confused. My son had just got engaged and would be getting married the Sunday before Christmas. His younger brother had married in June and his sister in July. Our three oldest children all married in one year.
Of course I was happy. And overwhelmed. And still trying to process (still am) so many drastic changes.
I've felt guilty over the year for not feeling anything but happy. But I think I'm coming to peace about it.
It hit the hardest last week as we celebrated Thanksgiving. We only know what we've experienced, and for 23 years the holidays have been about Jeff, me and our 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, and eventually 6 children along with relatives. Last week most of us were together, but the reality of this one family of 8 becoming 11 and even more than that 4 unique families . . well it was almost too much for this momma's head and heart to wrap around.
This week I read a post by a wise woman I know. Diana's words helped me. They gave me a strategy for traversing the emotionally laden transitions of life.
I will treasure our family's past. Reflecting as often as my heart desires on what has come before.
I will embrace our present and quit trying to always make sense of this new terrain. Rather I will travel and learn and BE.
And I will look forward to the future with hope and faith in my faithful God.
It's a good story, and I want to live every page.
Joining Lisa-Jo & Five Minute Friday
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